G.I. Joe: Rise of the Cobra comes to us as one of the most expensive movies made. At a total cost of over $350 million (production and advertising), viewers would expect to be wowed. But a huge budget isn't necessary to guarantee success. District 9 was made for a reportedly poultry $30 million - but has already doubled that in sales after one week and is receiving rave reviews worldwide. G.I. Joe fills the screen with violence and special effects. The latter is very well done. I would suggest most of the $200 million production costs have gone to CGI.
 
However, in an era where excellent special effects are the norm in action films, Stephen Sommers (director) should have put some of that money into finding some decent writers. Once you peel back the special effects and the action, writers Beattie and Gordan give us a pretty unintelligent script. Usually I try to avoid giving away too much of the story, preferring to allow viewers to see it themselves. However, in the case of G.I. Joe, in a world first, I'm going to make an exception to the rule. Here comes the spoiler. Drum roll ................. A team of G.I. Joe's fight an evil business man over weapons. Oh and there's guns - lots of guns. Yep, that's about it.
 
Mission Impossible III got away with a limited story, mostly because of the greatly directed action sequences, the even better Philip Seymour Hoffman, the beautiful Michelle Monoghan ... and a guy called Tom Cruise. G.I. Joe tries to follow a similar format. Action is aplenty. Christopher Ecclestone, who re-invigorated the stale Doctor Who franchise back in 2005, is again serviceable is his role as the evil McCullen/Destro. Siena Miller fills the eye candy role of the Baroness ... but there is no charismatic fill-in for Tom Cruise. Dennis Quaid's classic demeanor is wasted as General Hawk. In fact, the rest of the cast is quite forgetful.
 
Hasbro bought us the wonderful Transformers back in 2007 (oh and a little someone called Megan Fox). In 2009, Hasbro's follow up offerings, Transformers 2 and G.I. Joe: Rise of the Cobra, have invested largely in action, forgetting that some audience members also have a brain they don't mind using. Perhaps Sommers should give Neill Blomkamp (District 9 director) a call before shooting his next film, to see what a bit of heart and some smart directing/writing can do to a simple story ... and perhaps to save him a few hundred million dollars.
 
G.I. Joe isn't a bad film, it's just not a great one either.
 
Rating: 2.5/5